Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Gideon ~ "Broken"

Broken

I knew I was going to get in trouble when I broke my Mom’s window. It was the end of fall and my dad was taking out the screens and putting in the panes of glass. Meanwhile, I was on my trampoline playing soccer, which is right in front of my porch. When I kicked the ball, it soared ricocheted off the edge of the porch and came right back to me. I kicked it again this time I was unlucky I completely shattered the window. It flashed back into my mind what my dad told the time before I broke the window “next time you brake this window your paying for it” I really didn’t want to pay. I was in complete shock and fear at the fact that one pain of glass was now hundreds of tiny pieces. Fear’s BFF (best friend forever) is negativity he doesn’t like imagination or people to have fun fear is a bully. I was mortified at the remainders. I broke the window again!!! I tried to act like I didn’t do any thing but I am terrible liar whenever I lied my parents figure it out within seconds, they say I am horrid liar. But still I lied it wasn’t very useful because they knew I broke it. I think they the figured it out because there was a soccer ball next to the glass and I was the only person out side. In the end had I had to pay for a new window, which really wasn’t that bad because it was a small window which made it not too expensive.

4 comments:

  1. I like how acted realisticly after you broke the window.
    I liked your memory of your dad warning you. I can connect to that to many times.
    Your personification was really good.
    Schuyler Wagner

    ReplyDelete
  2. 1. I thought it was funny when you said yhat your parents said your not a very good lyer. I can connect to that because I have six brothers and they are always breaking things.
    2. I liked how you personifyed fear.
    3. I liked in your writing all the great vocabulary. columbia eiden

    ReplyDelete
  3. 1. I can't belive you kicked the ball a second time but this time you got in trouble.
    2. Wow when you lied you could have even got in more trouble.
    3. You did a good personify on the word FEAR.


    Brady Anderson

    ReplyDelete
  4. I liked how you described fear and negativity.

    you had characters response and characters thoughts and feelings.

    your personification was also really good!
    Tomi

    ReplyDelete